plz pray 4 me, k thx

So, prayer does nothing.

It was supposed to be good news, like the kind in the Bible. After three years, $2.4 million, and 1.7 million prayers, the biggest and best study ever was supposed to show that the prayers of faraway strangers help patients recover after heart surgery. But things didn't go as ordained. Patients who knowingly received prayers developed more post-surgery complications than did patients who unknowingly received prayers—and patients who were prayed for did no better than patients who weren't prayed for. In fact, patients who received prayers without their knowledge ended up with more major complications than did patients who received no prayers at all.

I could've saved these people a lot of time and money and told them this years ago. But nobody listens to Aaron.

When I was in junior high, I had this friend Vanessa who always used to tell me she would pray for me. "I'm gonna pray for you, Aaron, I'm gonna pray!" I would encourage her, saying, "Knock yourself out. In a year, nothing will have changed." A year came, nothing was different. Another year, same shit. Still an atheist. So it's been just over 10 years and still, I'm a total fucking atheist. Her prayers went unanswered. Why? Because god doesn't exist.